The clock on the right side of my laptop changed from 3:42 to 3:43am. From a distance the roosters echoed out their orchestrated shouts while I heard the door of my bathroom creaking, its hinges rusty from water sprayed during bath time.
My brain began to fall slowly to slumber. To the place where people had wings and each scene changed from happy to bad to weird in less than a minute. Inception? Or perhaps just wide awake and dreaming. I looked around and the only light I see is my screen and a mobile charger with an eerie blue glow.
Yes, I am still wide awake.
But my fingers moved on their own, a pit pat on the keyboard while my fan whirred incessantly. I managed to blink my lids, my eyes fighting my brain against going back towards the covers where pillows and sheep jumping over fences waited.
There's too much going on inside my brain. I browsed through facebook, then to a finance forum, then through blogger. My thoughts a jumble of status updates, bus explosions at Manila, to stock prices snapping back up after a five day low.
Everybody seemed to have their own say on everything.
People calling for attention or perhaps just voicing out the random nerve impulses their brains send to their hands. Happy, sad, excited, proud, or just selling a few colored shoes at bargain prices. Either way, the status updates showed a group of people I am connected with. Either by blood or friendship, they echo my ramblings, like a gong vibrating loud.
Loud. Politicians and every civic group are all crying out for justice over a bomb placed below a bus seat leaving 2 dead. Despite intel, people focused on the latest entertainment news and who got married with whom, nobody got cautious of 2 people riding a bus with a bag and leaving without it. Fear is present and alive.
Alive and resurrected from after 5 days of watching red, I grinned like a Cheshire cat upon seeing green on the ticker screen this morning. Celebration and cash flowing in, the Philippines' stock market thrived on good news. As of yesterday morning, the good news was people are much more optimistic about the government. The foreign investors thought so too.
I am happy that they did.
I am hoping they still think so until today.
Today, my eyes fight to stay awake battling my brain. A hardheaded pair trying to control the center of my thoughts. But as the winner stood proud over the defeated, my eyelids begin to slowly close. White flag waving up and down.
The sound of a motorcycle woke me up again. I muttered a prayer to please make tomorrow much better than today as the clock on the right side of my laptop now showed 4:06.
From a distance the roosters could still be heard, my bathroom door creaked, a dog barked...
and I know my prayer had been heard.