Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts

Sunday, January 16, 2011

overachiever




photo by s.calvert.dpchallenge.com


a pile of papers
on a messed up desk
a computer screen
flashing
flashing
white
light
a cup of coffee
spilled
some breadcrumbs
littered
a fan
electric
whirring
turning around
but the room
remains
damp
eerie

a certificate
hangs
on the wall
a reminder
of medals
and honors
achieved

a ballpoint pen
ink
oozing
on paper
notes
scribbled
trashed
on a bin
adjacent to
an unmade bed

where a girl
lay
dead
while clutching
a card
with
a grade
just a
point
short
of being
the best











If




photo by malou marquez-www.malousky.multiply.com



If I could count the words and tell
What the mind has failed to see
If I do know my thoughts so well
Why can't they let me be
If a clock's tick could stop for once
I'd fall into my dreams
I'd be a victor in this dance
Of pain and joy it seems
But then as all could not be good
And thorns do prick to bleed
I'd stand up again from where I stood
And love the one I need

poem written for the school paper way back college.

A Story on Appreciation



prelude: this story was sent by a friend. hope it would touch your heart as it touched mine, oh and i do hope you give a call to those people that you need to call to afterwards also, or perhaps just give them a big hug.




One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.


He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.


The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements
were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.


The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?" the youth answered "none".



The director asked, " Was it your father who paid for your school fees?"
The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it
was my mother who paid for my school fees.



The director asked, " Where did your mother work?" The youth answered, "My
mother worked as clothes cleaner. The director requested the youth to
show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and
perfect.




The director asked, " Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?"



The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read
more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.



The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean
your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.*



The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went
back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His
mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands
to the kid.



The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that.
It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so
wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were
so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.



This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands
that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee.
The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to
pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.



After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.



That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.



Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.



The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: " Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"



The youth answered, " I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes'



The Director asked, " please tell me your feelings."



The youth said,

Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not be a successful me today.

Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.

Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.




The director said, " This is what I am looking for to be my manager.

I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a
person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a
person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.



Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every
employee worked diligently and as a team. The company's performance
improved tremendously.

.............



A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted,
would develop "entitlement mentality" and would always put himself
first. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts. When he starts
work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he
becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees
and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good
academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not
feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and
fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really
showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?*




You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano,
watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them
experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls
together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not
have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a
right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents
are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that
young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to
appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the
ability to work with others to get things done.




You would have shared many stories to many and many of them would have back
mailed you too...but try and forward this story to as many as
possible...this may change somebody's fate...





Saturday, January 15, 2011

Being Twenty Something (from an email)



They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing
that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as
you.





You look at your job...and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe
you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.

One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.



You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to
know better.

Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.







You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself...and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!


What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.


little things (wrote last june 2008 at myspace)


photo by: karen tribett


bleed your tears then let them dry
ask yourself if you've done wrong and why
wallow in self pity, you're entitled to it sometimes
ask why you're not worthy, to possess just that dime
but you dance to life's tune, believe there's still hope
a rainbow behind the storm, one should not stop to mope
about things that have gone wrong
sometimes they really do
what one has to do is to be strong
believe you could really pull through
we all have our bruises , we all have our pains
we all had experienced glory, we all had gains
but if you look back you'd realize you had been happy before
you had little, you had less, but you had much more
no amount of wealth, nor success could replace real friends
those who would stick with you, through pain in the end
happiness is but fickle for those who aspire too much
realize your worth and you'll realize it does not mean such
life could be a pain, usually it even bleeds deep
but it also wakes you up to the things that you should keep
those that you hold dear, those that matter the most
those which make you smile, some you may think as ghosts
ghosts which you could really reach
if you'd open your eyes, if you'd seek
these little things that will always be real
these little things, they will always be true
despite the world's trials
these little things will stick
by you.


(written: june8, 2008: myspace blog)





Sunday, January 09, 2011

love

Love-an intense feeling of deep affection with 125,000,000 people searching for it or its related term every month at google. If you look at google images for pictures of it, there's 1,580,000,000 images for it.





Surprised?
I don't think so.

Look at what's currently trending at yahoo and you'd find love poems as one of them (that is as of 3:57am this morning).

Everybody it seems is looking for it, is wanting to define it, is wanting to put it in words, or is just plain depressed because of it. Either way, it can be manifested in many forms.

The first encounter I had with the word was when I was 5. There was this song on the radio that went with the lines " I'll make love to you, like you want me to and I'd hold you tight, baby all through the night..." As children literally interpreted everything based on their innocence, I concluded "love" at that age to be hugging someone close to you at night. Kinda like my mom giving me that warm bear hug before saying good night. Imagine my mom's reaction when she heard me singing that song at home...hehe...

In a country where the late night news displays killings, robberies, and corruption 70% of the time and afternoon gossip is more of what's happening at the local entertainment grapevine, one could not help but think why stories of "love" rarely make it to the news nowadays.

If 125,000,000 are searching monthly for it, why then is it not commonly on the news?

Some look for it at one point in their lives or even their entire lives
Some shrug it off and decide that the pain left by it is more than enough to not look for it again.
Some are lucky to have it but they're too busy still looking for it
Some keep on playing until they realize they've run out of players
Some believe it would come
Some would try to define it
Some would try to live it
Some keep their fingers crossed for second chances
Some look at it as sacrifice
Some see it through 1 Corinthians 13:1-13
Some see it in faith
Some see it in relationships
Some see it in material possessions
Some know it when they are happy with what they are doing

I can go on and on all morning trying to define it.
But for me it all comes down to these 5 statements

1. Love is waking up each day to another chance
2. Love is a hug, a kiss, or an arm on your shoulder letting you know that no matter what happens, you'd always have someone or people who would never give up on you
3. Love is giving the last cookie up (if you were cookie monster). :)
4. Love is happiness and pain combined in a blender...hehe...
5. Love for me might be different for what it may mean to you. It is highly subjective, prone to arguments and debates, and makes the smartest people dumb and the dumbest people would be rocket scientists...

but it all boils down to one meaning though...

you never would have truly lived if you hadn't loved.:)

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

things will go my way

chasing dreams
like kites
floating
in the air
only to be
falling down
again
with a gust
of wind
strong enough
to pull
me down
yet never
strong enough
to stop
me
from trying
to soar
high
yet again

Thursday, November 20, 2008

24 things i learned at 24

  1. Your best look could be that out of bed bum look when you wake up every morning.
  2. When you’ve finally convinced yourself you’ve grown up, you realize you’re still a kid at heart
  3. You have more friends but less real ones
  4. The career is good but you can’t also wait to get away sometimes.
  5. You sometimes make the rules as you go along (and oh, break some too)
  6. You begin thinking about that bulge that was non-existent when you were seventeen…and wonder, how did it ever get to be like that anyway?
  7. Coffee in paper cups seems very much a must
  8. You have all the world to choose from, but some bills somehow get in the way
  9. You actually learn how to put on good make up, strut your stuff in high heels, and dress like you’re a million bucks.
  10. You are starting to get this mild case of alzheimers and start forgetting how to spell simple words
  11. You realize that cafeteria food is floating on fat and though that posh resto costs too much, its better to splurge cash on something less greasy for awhile
  12. Dark chocolate tastes much better than the sweet milk bars.
  13. There’s no harm in flaunting what you were given
  14. You could get into other people’s nerves even if you did not do anything
  15. You try pleasing everyone and you get that pile of paper work on your desk because you could never say no
  16. Somehow you’re more sure of where you are going but could never seem to figure out how to get there
  17. Your wardrobe needs some new additions almost every other month
  18. Spas are good places to relax to, only if you don’t have a sadistic masseause to contend with
  19. You drink to all that you have lost and toast it up to it not being worth your time anyway
  20. You see less of the sun on your way home
  21. You’re done pretending to be someone you are not
  22. The night news is bound to make you feel bad (shouldn’t they add good news too?)
  23. You never did know how to cook the way your mom did.
  24. And lastly that you never are ever too old enough to be stop learning…you’re still stuck with ABCs in the form of management problems…and your crayons when you get real fed up.























Monday, July 21, 2008

selling the drama

if you'd take time to listen

to thoughts left unsaid

jumble up the words

bounce up and down your bed

try to shout your lungs out

hear your mind scream

liberate that being

you only once dreamed

if only you'd see through the joker

and see his tears in the rain

you'd know behind that smile

there is a tinkling of pain

like a facade cleverly placed

a smile really masked

by that jeer and that laugh

you'd see through if you ask

if you know you're free enough

to soar up and fly

you'd shed those inhibitions

without asking why

you'd love like you've never been hurt

and see the rainbow behind the storm

you'd hold him close for now

and conquer society's rules and norms

if you'd feel your heart deep

and let it engulf you down

to that abyss where one

is neither beauty nor clown

you'd buy my thoughts for a sixpence or two

as i sell my own piece of drama

not just for me but for you...

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The God Memorandum

To You From God;

Take counsel. I hear your cry. It passes through the darkness, filters through the clouds, mingles with starlight, and finds its way to my heart on the path of a sunbeam.
I have anguished over the cry of a hare choked in the noose of a snare, a sparrow tumbled from the nest of its mother, a child thrashing helplessly in a pond, and a son shedding his blood on a cross.
Know that I hear you, also. Be at peace. Be calm. I bring thee relief for your sorrow for I know its cause...and its cure.
You weep for all your childhood dreams that have vanished with the years. You weep for all your self-esteem that has been corrupted by failure. You weep for all your potential that has been bartered for security. You weep for all your individuality that has been trampled by mobs. You weep for all your talent that has been wasted through misuse.
You look upon yourself with disgrace and you turn in terror from the image you see in the pool. Who is this mockery of humanity staring back at you with bloodless eyes of shame? Where is the grace of your manner, the beauty of your figure, the quickness of your movement, the clarity of your mind, the brilliance of your tongue? Who stole your goods. Is the thief's identity known to you, as it is to me?
Once you placed your head in a pillow of grass in your father's field and looked up at a cathedral of clouds and knew that all the gold of Babylon would be yours in time. Once you read from many books and wrote on many tablets, convinced beyond any doubt that all the wisdom of Solomon would be equaled and surpassed by you. And the seasons would flow into years until lo, you would reign supreme in your own garden of Eden.
Dost thou remember who implanted those plans and dreams and seeds of hope within you? You cannot. You have no memory of that moment when first you emerged from your mother's womb and I placed my hand on your soft brow. And the secret I whispered in your small ear when I bestowed my blessings upon you?
Remember our secret? You cannot. The passing years have destroyed your recollection, for they have filled your mind with fear and doubt and anxiety and remorse and hate and there is no room for joyful memories where these beasts habitate.
Weep no more, I am with you...and this moment is the dividing line of your life. All that has gone before is like unto no more than that time you slept within your mother's womb. What is past is dead. Let the dead bury the dead.
This day you return from the living dead. This day, like unto Elijah with the widow's son, I stretch myself upon thee three times and you live again. This day, like unto Elisha with the Shunammite's son, I put my mouth upon your mouth and my eyes upon your eyes and my hands upon your hands and your flesh is warm again. This day, like unto Jesus at the tomb of Lazarus, I command you to come forth and you will walk from your cave of doom to begin a new life.
This is your birthday. This is your new date of birth. Your first life, like unto a play of the theatre, was only a rehearsal. This time the curtain is up. This time the world watches and waits to applaud. This time you will not fail.
Light your candles. Share your cake. Pour the wine. You have been reborn. Like a butterfly from its chrysalis you will fly...fly as high as you wish, and neither the wasps nor dragonflies nor mantids of mankind shall obstruct your mission or your search for the true riches of life.
Feel my hand upon thy head. Attend to my wisdom. Let me share with you, again, the secret you heard at your birth and forgot.
You are my greatest miracle.
You are the greatest miracle in the world.
Those were the first words you ever heard. Then you cried. They all cry.
You did not believe me then...and nothing has happened in the intervening years to correct your disbelief. For how could you be a miracle when you consider yourself a failure at the most menial of tasks? How can you be a miracle when you have little confidence in dealing with the most trivial of responsibilities? How can you be a miracle when you are shackled by debt and lie awake in torment over whence will come tomorrow's bread?
Enough. The milk that is spilled is sour. Yet, how many prophets, how many wise men, how many poets, how many artists, how many composers, how many scientists, how many philosophers and messengers have I sent with the word of your divinity, your potential for godliness, and the secrets of achievement? How did you treat them?
Still I love you and I am with you now, through these words, to fulfill the prophet who announced that the Lord shall set his hand again, the second time, to recover the remnant of his people. I have set my hand again. This is the second time. You are my remnant.
It is of no avail to ask, haven't you known, haven't you heard, hasn't it been told to you from the beginning; haven't you understood from the foundations of the earth? You have not known; you have not heard; you have not understood.
You have been told that you are a divinity is disguise, a god playing fool. You have been told that you are a special piece of work, noble in reason, infinite in faculties, express and admirable in form and moving, like an angel in action, like a god in apprehension. You have been told that you are the salt of the earth. You were given the secret even of moving mountains, of performing the impossible.
You believed no one. You burned your map to happiness, you abandoned your claim to peace of mind, you snuffed out the candles that had been placed along your destined path of glory, and then you stumbled, lost and frightened, in the darkness of futility and self-pity, until you fell into a hell of your own creation.
Then you cried and beat your breast and cursed the luck that had befallen you. You refused to accept the consequences of your own petty thoughts and lazy deeds and you searched for a scapegoat on which to blame your failure. How quickly you found one.
You blamed me! You cried that your handicaps, your mediocrity, your lack of opportunity, your failures...were the will of God!
You were wrong! Let us take inventory. Let us, first, call a roll of your handicaps. For how can I ask you to build a new life lest you have the tools?
Are you blind? Does the sun rise and fall without your witness? No. You can see...and the hundred million receptors I have placed in your eyes enable you to enjoy the magic of a leaf, a snowflake, a pond, an eagle, a child, a cloud, a star, a rose, a rainbow... and the look of love. Count one blessing.
Are you deaf? Can a baby laugh or cry without your attention? No. You can hear...and the twenty-four thousand fibers I have built in each of your ears vibrate to the wind in the trees, the tides on the rocks, the majesty of an opera, a robin's plea, children at play...and the words "I love you." Count another blessing.
Are you mute? Do your lips move and bring forth only spittle? No. You can speak...as can no other of my creatures, and your words can calm the angry, uplift the despondent, goad the quitter, cheer the unhappy, warm the lonely, praise the worthy, encourage the defeated, teach the ignorant...and say I love you. Count another blessing.
Are you paralyzed? Does your helpless form despoil the land? No. You can move. You are not a tree condemned to a small plot while the wind and world abuse you. You can stretch and run and dance and work, for within you I have designed five hundred muscles, two hundred bones, and seven miles of nerve fibre all synchronized by me to do your bidding. Count another blessing.
Are you unloved and unloving? Does loneliness engulf you, night and day? No. No more. For now you know love's secret, that to receive love it must be given with no thought of its return. To love for fulfillment, satisfaction, or pride, is no love. Love is a gift on which no return is demanded. Now you know that to love unselfishly is its own reward. And even should love not be returned it is not lost, for love not reciprocated will flow back to you and soften and purify your heart. Count another blessing. Count twice.
Is your heart stricken? Does it leak and strain to maintain your life? No. Your heart is strong. Touch your chest and feel its rhythm, pulsating, hour after hour, day and night, thirty-six million beats each year, year after year, asleep or awake, pumping your blood through more than sixty thousand miles of veins, arteries, and tubing...pumping more than six hundred thousand gallons each year. Man has never created such a machine. Count another blessing.
Are you diseased of skin? Do people turn in horror when you approach? No. Your skin is clear and a marvel of creation, needing only that you tend it with soap and oil and brush and care. In time all steels will tarnish and rust, but not your skin. Eventually the strongest of metals will wear, with use, but not that layer that I have constructed around you. Constantly it renews itself, old cells replaced by new, just as the old you is now being replaced by the new. Count another blessing.
Are your lungs befouled? Does the breath of life struggle to enter your body? No. Your portholes to life support you even in the vilest of environments of your own making, and they labor always to filter life-giving oxygen through six hundred million pockets of folded flesh while they rid your body of gaseous wastes. Count another blessing.
Is your blood poisoned? Is it diluted with water and pus? No. Within your five quarts of blood are twenty-two trillion blood cells and within each cell are millions of molecules and within each molecule is an atom oscillating at more than ten million times each second. Each second, two million of your blood cells die to be replaced by two million more in a resurrection that has continued since your first birth. As it has always been inside, so now it is on your outside. Count another blessing.
Are you feeble of mind? Can you no longer think for yourself? No. Your brain is the most complex structure in the universe. I know. Within its three pounds are fifteen billion nerve cells, more than three times as many cells as there are people on your earth. To help you file away every perception, every sound, every taste, every smell, every action you have experienced since the day of your birth, I have implanted within your cells, more than one thousand billion billion protein molecules. Every incident in your life is there waiting only your recall. And, to assist your brain in the control of your body I have dispersed, throughout your form, four million pain-sensitive structures, five hundred thousand touch detectors, and more than two hundred thousand temperature detectors.
No nation's gold is better protected than you. None of your ancient wonders are greater than you. You are my finest creation. Within you is enough atomic energy to destroy any of the world's great cities...and rebuild it.
Are you poor? Is there no gold or silver in your purse? No. You are rich! Together we have just counted your wealth. Study the list. Count them again. Tally your assets! Why have you betrayed yourself? Why have you cried that all the blessings of humanity were removed from you? Why did you deceive yourself that you were powerless to change your life? Are you without talent, senses, abilities, pleasures, instincts, sensations, and pride? Are you without hope? Why do you cringe in the shadows, a giant defeated, awaiting only sympathetic transport into the welcome void and dampness of hell?
You have so much. Your blessings overflow your cup...and you have been unmindful of them, like a child spoiled in luxury, since I have bestowed them upon you with generosity and regularity. Answer me. Answer yourself. What rich man, old and sick, feeble and helpless, would not exchange all the gold in his vault for the blessings you have treated so lightly?
Know then the first secret to happiness and success, you possess, even now, every blessing necessary to achieve great glory. They are your treasure, your tools with which to build, starting today, the foundation for a new and better life.
Therefore, I say unto you, count your blessings and know that you already are my greatest creation. This is the first law you must obey in order to perform the greatest miracle in the world, the return of your humanity from living death.
And be grateful for your lessons learned in poverty. For he is not poor who has little; only he that desires much...and true security lies not in the things one has but in the things one can do without. Where are the handicaps that produced your failure? They existed only in your mind. Count your blessings.
And the second law is like unto the first. Proclaim your rarity. You had condemned yourself to a potter's field, and there you lay, unable to forgive your own failure, destroying yourself with self-hate, self-incrimination, and revulsion at your crimes against yourself and others.
Are you not perplexed? Do you not wonder why I am able to forgive your failures, your transgressions, your pitiful demeanor...when you cannot forgive yourself? I address you now, for three reasons. You need me. You are not one of a herd heading for destruction in a gray mass of mediocrity. And...you are a great rarity.
Consider a painting by Rembrandt or a bronze by Degas or a violin by Stradivarius or a play by Shakespeare. They have great value for two reasons: their creators were masters and they are few in number. Yet there are more than one of each of these. On that reasoning you are the most valuable treasure on the face of the earth, for you know who created you and there is only one of you.
Never, in all the seventy billion humans who have walked this planet since the beginning of time has there been anyone exactly like you. Never, until the end of time, will there be another such as you.
You have shown no knowledge or appreciation of your uniqueness. Yet, you are the rarest thing in the world.
From your father, in his moment of supreme love, flowed countless seeds of love, more than four hundred million in number. All of them, as they swam within your mother, gave up the ghost and died. All except one! You.


"If you believe,
you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."
(Jesus Christ - The Holy Bible: Matthew 21:22)


You alone persevered within the loving warmth of your mother's body, searching for your other half, a single cell from your mother so small that more than two million would be necessary to fill an acorn shell. Yet, despite impossible odds, in that vast ocean of darkness and disaster, you persevered, found that infinitesimal cell, joined with it, and began a knew life. Your life.
You arrived, bringing with you, as does every child, the message that I was not yet discouraged of man. Two cells, now united in a miracle. Two cells, each containing twenty-three chromosomes and within each chromosome hundreds of genes, which would govern every characteristic about you, from the color of your eyes to the charm of your manner to the size of your brain.
With all the combinations at my command, beginning with that singe sperm from your father's four hundred million, through the hundreds of genes in each of the chromosomes from your mother and father, I could have created three hundred thousand billion humans, each different from the other.
But who did I bring forth? You! One of a kind. Rarest of the rare. A priceless treasure, possessed of qualities in mind and speech and movement and appearance and actions as no other who has ever lived, lives or shall live. Why have you valued yourself in pennies when you are worth a king's ransom? Why did you listen to those who demeaned you...and far worse, why did you believe them?
Take counsel. No longer hide your rarity in the dark. Bring it forth. Show the world. Strive not to walk as your brother walks, nor talk as your leader talks, nor labor as do the mediocre. Never do as another. Never imitate. For how do you know that you may not imitate evil; and he who imitates evil always goes beyond the example set, while he who imitates what is good always falls short. Imitate no one. Be yourself. Show your rarity to the world and they will shower you with gold. This then is the second law. Proclaim your rarity. And now you have received two laws. Count your blessings! Proclaim your rarity! You have no handicaps. You are not mediocre.
You nod. You force a smile. You admit your self-deception. What of your next complaint? Opportunity never seeks thee!
Take counsel and it shall come to pass, for now I give you the law of success in every venture. Many centuries ago this law was given to your forefathers from a mountain top. Some heeded the law and lo, their life was filled with the fruit of happiness, accomplishment, gold, and peace of mind. Most listened not, for they sought magic means, devious routes, or waited for the devil called luck to deliver to them the riches of life. They waited in vain...just as you waited, and then they wept, as you wept, blaming their lack of fortune on my will.
The law is simple. Young or old, pauper or king, white or black, male or female...all can use the secret to their advantage; for of all the rules and speeches and scriptures of success and how to attain it, only one method has never failed...whomsoever shall compel ye to go with him one mile...go with him two.
This then is the third law...the secret that will produce riches and acclaim beyond your dreams. Go another mile!
The only certain means of success is to render more and better service than is expected of you, no matter what your task may be. This is a habit followed by all successful people since the beginning of time. Therefore I saith the surest way to doom yourself to mediocrity is to perform only the work for which you are paid.
Think not ye are being cheated if you deliver more than the silver you receive. For there is a pendulum to all life and the sweat you deliver, if not rewarded today, will swing back tomorrow, tenfold. The mediocre never goes another mile, for why should he cheat himself, he thinks. But you are not mediocre. To go another mile is a privilege you must appropriate by your own initiative. You cannot, you must not avoid it. Neglect it, do only as little as the others, and the responsibility for your failure is yours alone.
You can no more render service without receiving just compensation than you can withhold the rendering of it without suffering the loss of reward. Cause and effect, means and ends, seed and fruit, these cannot be separated. The effect already blooms in the cause, the end preexists the means, and the fruit is always in the seed.
Go another mile. Concern yourself not, should you serve an ungrateful master. Serve him more. And instead of him, let it be me who is in your debt, for then you will know that every minute, every stroke of extra service will be repaid. And worry not, should your reward not come soon. For the longer payment is withheld, the better for you...and compound interest on compound interest is the law's greatest benefit.
You cannot command success, you can only deserve it...and now you know the great secret necessary in order to merit its rare reward. Go another mile!
Where is this field from whence you cried there was no opportunity? Look! Look around thee. See, where only yesterday you wallowed on the refuse of self-pity, you now walk tall on a carpet of gold. Nothing has changed...except you, but you are everything.
You are my greatest miracle.
You are the greatest miracle in the world.
And now the laws of happiness and success are three. Count your blessings! Proclaim your rarity! Go another mile!
Be patient with your progress. To count your blessings with gratitude, to proclaim your rarity with pride, to go an extra mile and then another, these acts are not accomplished in the blinking of an eye. Yet, that which you acquire with most difficulty you retain the longest; as those who have earned a fortune are more careful of it than those by whom it was inherited.
And fear not as you enter your new life. Every noble acquisition is attended with its risks. He who fears to encounter the one must not expect to obtain the other. Now you know you are a miracle. And there is no fear in a miracle.
Be proud. You are not the momentary whim of a careless creator experimenting in the laboratory of life. You are not a slave of forces that you cannot comprehend. You are a free manifestation of no force but mine, of no love but mine. You were made with a purpose.
Feel my hand. Hear my words. You need me...and I need you. We have a world to rebuild...and if it requireth a miracle what is that to us? We are both miracles and now we have each other.
Never have I lost faith in you since that day when I first spun you from a giant wave and tossed you helplessly on the sands. As you measure time that was more than five hundred million years ago. There were many models, many shapes, many sizes, before I reached perfection in you more than thirty thousand years ago. I have made no further effort to improve on you in all these years.
For how could one improve on a miracle? You were a marvel to behold and I was pleased. I gave you this world and dominion over it. Then, to enable you to reach your full potential I placed my hand on you, once more, and endowed you with powers unknown to any other creature in the universe, even unto this day.
I gave you the power to think. I gave you the power to love.
I gave you the power to will. I gave you the power to laugh.
I gave you the power to imagine. I gave you the power to create.
I gave you the power to plan. I gave you the power to speak.
I gave you the power to pray.
My pride in you knew no bounds. You were my ultimate creation, my greatest miracle. A complete living being. One who can adjust to any climate, any hardship, any challenge. One who can manage his own destiny without interference from me. One who can translate a sensation or perception, not by instinct, but by thought and deliberation into whatever action is best for himself and all humanity.
Thus we come to the fourth law of success and happiness...for I gave you one more power, a power so great that not even my angels possess it. I gave you...the power to choose.
With this gift I placed you even above my angels...for angels are not free to choose sin. I gave you complete control over your destiny. I told you to determine, for yourself, your own nature in accordance with your own free will. Neither heavenly nor earthly in nature, you were free to fashion yourself in whatever form you preferred. You had the power to choose to degenerate into the lowest forms of life, but you also had the power, out of your soul's judgement, to be reborn into the higher forms, which are divine.
I have never withdrawn your great power, the power to choose.
What have you done with this tremendous force? Look at yourself. Think of the choices you have made in your life and recall, now, those bitter moments when you would fall to your knees if only you had the opportunity to choose again.
What is past is past...and now you know the fourth great law of happiness and success...Use wisely, your power of choice.
Choose to love...rather than hate. Choose to laugh...rather than cry.
Choose to create...rather than destroy.
Choose to persevere...rather than quit.
Choose to praise...rather than gossip.
Choose to heal...rather than wound.
Choose to give...rather than steal.
Choose to act...rather than procrastinate.
Choose to grow...rather than rot. Choose to pray...rather than curse.
Choose to live...rather than die.
Now you know that your misfortunes were not my will, for all power was vested in you, and the accumulation of deeds and thoughts which placed you on the refuse of humanity were your doing, not mine. My gifts of power were too large for your small nature. Now you have grown tall and wise and the fruits of the land will be yours.
You are more than a human being, you are a human becoming. You are capable of great wonders. Your potential is unlimited. Who else, among my creatures, has mastered fire? Who else, among my creatures, has conquered gravity, has pierced the heavens, has conquered disease and pestilence and drought?
Never demean yourself again! Never settle for the crumbs of life! Never hide your talents, from this day hence!
Remember the child who says "when I am a big boy." But what is that? For the big boy says, "when I grow up." And then grown up, he says, "when I am wed." But to be wed, what is that, after all? The thought then changes to "when I retire." And then, retirement comes, and he looks back over the landscape traversed; a cold wind sweeps over it and somehow he has missed it all and it is gone.
Enjoy this day, today...and tomorrow, tomorrow. You have performed the greatest miracle in the world. You have returned from a living death. You will feel self-pity no more and each new day will be a challenge and a joy.
You have been born again..but just as before, you can choose failure and despair or success and happiness. The choice is yours. The choice is exclusively yours. I can only watch, as before...in pride...or sorrow.
Remember, then, the four laws of happiness and success. Count your blessings. Proclaim your rarity. Go another mile. Use wisely your power of choice. And one more, to fulfill the other four. Do all things with love...love for yourself, love for all others, and love for me.
Wipe away your tears. Reach out, grasp my hand, and stand straight. Let me cut the grave cloths that have bound you. This day you have been notified.
You are the greatest miracle in the world.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Small Prayers, why they work, and why they sometimes dont

As I was surfing the net and at the same time asking God on what I should do with my life as of the moment (i will be jobless by christmas), I stumbled upon the article at washingtonpost.com with the title "Small Prayers Get Answered". It caught my attention so I decided to read on. It was about a man who had lost a yellow hat for years and prayed to God that his hat be found. The next day he was offered a temporary job at his dentist and while he was about his menial tasks, he saw his hat, all dusty and old above his dentist's cabinet. Surprise! Surprise! But yes, his small prayer got answered.

Inspired by the hat story, I decided to continue on searching the net for just about anything that would be related to prayer. I wanted to look for a prayer to help me find a job immediately after I lost this one. And yes, like that prayer that the man prayed, i prayed that i would find what he (the lord) wants to tell me now considering my situation and the website blogthebible.com got my attention. The title of the blog was "Why Prayers Don't Work" Phew! Twas a complete contradiction of what I read on the previous site with the yellow hat thing. But it got my attention and so I read on, convinced that along those lines, there would be answers.

The site was an interesting read. But what it basically implied was our prayers sometimes do not work because we fear too much, and we trust less. The fact that we lack belief on ourselves and on the power of the divine adds up to it not coming true. If one therefore believed in his heart of hearts that his prayer would come true, it wont just be the Lord working, it would also be the person himself. Then comes the power of positive thinking. A man they say thinketh and so he becomes. Thus, if we desire to be successful, we must act to be one, and continuously believe with the help of the Lord that indeed we could be.

Then it got me into thinking that indeed there was some point to what Dakotta (the blogger's name) was saying. Based from experience, only those that I really really desired and worked hard for became mine. Working hard for something also means that one is affirming the need for it in one's life. That there is a reason big enough that it should be given to you.

Before I read the article, I had doubts regarding what would happen to me afterwards. I am the kind who makes sure everything is in place, I am the kind who makes sure that there are no loopholes in what I do. But there are times when things go out of control. That despite all my valiant efforts to succeed, still something wrong comes to show its angry butt. I realized now, that we could only do so little by ourselves, especially if we have doubt. We must believe that we are given all that we need. That we are capable of making our dreams come true. Only then if we believe that we could would it happen. No setback, trial or failure could get in the way of that if you have the drive.

We must have purpose in our lives. Something that is worth living for. Something that is worth praying and believing for. We could do it on our own, but only until when? Which leads me back to my experience now, I was forced to resign out of a job I like, my dad's sick with a thousand bucks a day of medication, and we (my family) are running out of cash fast. Some would say, phew, you sure are one unlucky person, where's the four leaf clover eh? But as for me, after reading what God has wanted me to realize, I now know I could be who I want to be. I now know we'd make it through what we are going through.

When asked during college that if I were given the chance to ask for one of the seven gifts of the holy spirit what would it be and why.

I smiled. Looked back at the facilitator and said just one word.

Faith.

I know my small prayer had worked. God had answered fast. I just need to believe that I can and he can make my bigger prayer come true.

I just need to have faith.
More and more of it.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

What they could not take away

To someone stumbling accidentally on this blog, he or she would probably think this girl really is all "emo" and sure has the whole world collapsing down her shoulders. I know its what other people would say, because just awhile ago, I was thinking the same thing. Why was the whole world beginning to collapse on me? What did I do wrong?

Life has this weird way of piercing us with needles. It could either bleed blood or feel as though you have gone on one acupuncture session to relieve your pain. But my life has been more of the needles drawing out blood. My cross has gone heavier in the last few days and though I try hard to be strong and to face the world with my chin held high, I could not stop the tears from falling. I could not help it, though I show my strength, I still am weak.

As of now, I know I have yet alot to learn. Which makes this job probationary. Nobody has shown me the ropes, again, I was on my own, little did I know, I was literally that. On my own. No help from other departments by which you have helped, no concern from people who should have been responsible in the first place. The load was placed on my shoulders, and there is no one there to help me carry but myself. Now, I am deciding not because I feel betrayed, hurt, and left behind, I am deciding because I feel there is no use doing something and giving your heart to an institution who does not care about what you have accomplished anyway but only sees the faults. I feel there is no use in me staying as the system could not be changed, not by someone like me that is.

Am just darn thankful that I found out sooner. At least I only invested five months. But I loved my job here. No, it was not that easy, and no the responsibilities are not that simple as well, but what was worst is that you are left to hang in mid-air without any support from the supposedly people who would support you. It has been hard and I did not expect this to happen. I do not care anymore if the owner said that because he was mad, but the fact that he said it and he shouted it means only one thing. They do not need me here and that I am as indispensible as a room service waiter who had really done something wrong. No, they did not see that their own system has its loopholes. They did not see that the previous one who handled this position did little to change it, even did little to monitor it. All they saw were a few minor details that was not even under my responsibility in the first place. Which is why I decided I had to leave. I had cried enough tears, but I would still hold my head high because though they pay me, they do not own me. I still have my own rights and I am willing to stick to it.

I was surprised upon hearing awhile ago that he has plans of terminating me. He does not even know the whole picture yet he does not even ask for my own reason behind such matter. I was at the other property conducting a food safety seminar and he wanted me out just because he saw some leaking faucets here while I was not around. Do I have to repair the faucets myself? Is it not another department's job? Why then do I have to be blamed for something I do not even handle?

I believe life though its needles sometimes draws blood, will also always be a wheel turning on its own. It would never be the same all the time. Today he holds power, one day, that same power would be the cause of his own downfall. I will not be defeated, nor will I grovel for something that possibly should not have been mine. I will not beg that they keep me in this job. Come Monday, they will see that resignation letter on the office and it will be my time to prove myself. It is not my loss. I know, because only few would fall for this job at such a low pay. My pride is not even worth the salary I receive. Why then think its a complete waste?

The Lord would never leave me. I know he's beside me right now listening to what I am saying. They could take away my job but they could never take away what I have earned on my own. They could never take away my own self respect.

Someday, I will rise on my own two feet and prove them wrong. They could not take that away from me. I will focus on what they could not take, and by the time I am healed, I will be stronger, better and definitely on top of life's little wheel.

Monday, October 09, 2006

food...water...anyone?






This is one more reason why we have to thank God for the food that we can have easily. But in the otherhand....ironicaly, we still waste the food that we buy. I feel very GRATEFUL for what I have today....... We are so Blessed for the wonderful works of God's hand in our life today, just think of this .............. "I felt very fortunate to live in this part of the world. I promise I will never waste my food no matter how bad it can taste and how full I may be. I promise not to waste water. I pray that this little boy be alleviated from his suffering. I pray that we will be more sensitive towards the suffering in the world around us and not be blinded by our own selfish nature and interests. I hope this picture will always serve as a reminder to us about how fortunate we are and that we must never ever take things for granted. Think & look at this...when you complain about your food and the food we waste daily..." MAY ALL HUMAN BEINGS BE FREE FROM SUFFERING!!!! Please don't break this, keep on forwarding it to all our friends. On this good day, let's make a prayer for the suffering in any place around the globe and send this friendly reminder to others.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

INK




I struggled to write words that make sense
As if seeing them make sense
Could actually lessen this emptiness
That vague recollection
of what I had been
and what I should be

My pen scribbles up and down
A rollercoaster on a 0.4 tip
blank ink oozing
But do I know who I am?
Why I write? Why I speak?
No.

Yes.
I read their works.
Those with the fancy wordings and intricate plots
Those who tell about life
the truth
and the fairy dust.
Those with certificates and medals
proclaiming them best.

Best.
They say they did not plan it to be
Their offices were either chrome or steel
or just plain
birds chirping
leaves dancing
to the tune of the wind.
But they wrote. They had thoughts.
Inscribed by ink on paper.
Like me.
Now,
they just happened to be lucky.

Luck.
Once in a while, I think it has gone off far.
Traversing its own way
to leave me alone
gaping dumb
my sorry ass
hoping for it to land
on my palms
like the butterfly with the blue wings
early this morning.

Morning.
My clock says its way past one.
I hear its tick-tock.
A monotonous rhythm.
A reminder that I should close my lids to snuggle
Beneath flowery blankets with edges
mistaken for cheese
by mice.

Mice.
They scurried around my room.
Noses sniffing scents of likely and unlikely aroma
like my feet
after a day's work.
Geniuses with brains the size of my fingernail
outwitting the human ingenuity
of metal and wood
known as traps.

Traps.
Lay in every corner of the mass
of gray and white
matter, science called
a brain.
But words elude them
like mice
munching on my blankets
outwitting my traps
so like my thoughts
and words
that make no sense.

Sense.
I feel less empty now...thoughts start to empty out now
Up
Down
Up
Down
A rollercoaster on a 0.4 tip
Blank ink oozing
oozing
until ink
ran
dry

Saturday, September 23, 2006

like i've found one decent man on irc

it all starts with a "hi" or a "hello", and talking to an entirely unknown stranger would begin. today i talked to around 15 of them, and in the middle of conversations the issue of sex would usually be asked...turns out talking or chatting for some people is entirely about imagining yourself getting horny. don't get me wrong, probably some people just really do have needs they could not satisfy physically so they use the keyboard instead... (kidding). but with the entire hour of talking to people from different parts of the globe, i was really surprised to have stumbled on one who really was interesting to talk to.

based on the first paragraph one would think that person i found interesting would probably have talked about stuff other than sex. wrong. that was what we were talking about. but not the physical online sex that is. we talked about the aspect of being with another person, relationships and why men are different from women. and the whole Men are Mars, Women are from Venus kinda stuff. and come to think of it, there really is alot more to men and women that i just realized.

he was really this sensitive guy who had lots of questions only someone of the opposite sex could answer or perhaps clarify. like, if one night stands make a girl feel really bad...or does he have to say sorry or something if he doesnt impress a girl...or is it way much better if he stop fooling around and be serious for a change...and the answers are all up to him anyway. i told him that if it was clear in the first place for both him and the girl that it was just a one night stand then he has nothing to be guilty about. That if the girl feels bad, then she is not mature enough to have agreed on it in the first place. Don't get me wrong, am not that liberated, its just that if u both agreed beforehand then whats the drama about? With regards to the fooling around, I told him it would all be entirely up to him. Fooling around could be fun for some but when ur fooling around with the wrong individuals it could get pretty nasty and end up in spats and disagreements. When one decides to be serious about what he or she wants for a change, I believe then one has probably found what it is that he or she is looking for. Fooling around would then be just for kids.

Then again it all comes down to one thing. Our lives are determined by our decisions and our actions. No, we could not rewind it back, i say to him, but we could learn from whatever it is we've done wrong. One night stands and relationships all have something to do with those decisions, I may be telling him how I feel about such, but then again the decision would be up to him. Whew! I sounded really serious back there.

He was quiet then for awhile then asked me something.
Would i do it with him online?
Phew!

Did i find one decent man on irc?
hmmmm....

u be the judge.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

On the edge of nowhere



How can one say that everything is through?
That life has concluded and its time to fall down on your knees to wish that what lies beyond this earth would be more pleasing.
Everyone, yes everyone has to go through this life with a heavy load on the back. Probably its the way this world works, or probably because we allow ourselves to be burdened too much by the fast paced lifestyles we have that we think so. But then the reality is, we all have troubles, we all have doubts, and nobody is perfect.
Perfection. Some would probably define it as seeing those faces on billboards, not a line on their foreheads, teeth all white, or perhaps a new pair of shoes, a gleaming new car or a beauty contestant answering World Peace.
We fail to realize that those faces that we see may just be beauty without attitude, those shoes may have killed a factory worker while it is being done, that car could have automotive defects, and the beauty contestant may just be answering World Peace not because she wants to but because it will give her the crown she's been dreaming on her head since birth.
The bottom line is,
nobody is perfect.
and sooner or later we all find ourselves near the edge.
or much worse,
on the edge
of nowhere.
Well wouldn't? Everybody has problems right?
Then again, we could stop ourselves from being on that edge.
If we accept that life with its own imperfections and scars could prove evidence of how we had lived to survive the years that had passed, then we would be a step off that edge.
If we try to act earlier instead of getting ourselves deep down with nothing to hold on to then we wouldn't be as confused and as out of direction as most of us are in right now.
I have my own share of falling into that nowhere, and its no piece of cake getting out. We fall because of our decisions, of our deeds. But then the past would always seem farther every second and if you look too far at it,it would probably just take you in with it.
I guess, we just have to believe we can get out in whatever problem it is we are in right now.
Yes, it all starts with believing.
Then nothing would be impossible.
And probably, yes probably, we'd find ourselves more on top with success in our hands than
falling
out
on the
edge of nowhere